We are a married couple who adopted our little Russky, Nikita {aka Nicky, Nicky noodle, little man, Nikoli, the Nickster, crazy dude, goofball, puppy love, etc...you get the picture!} from St Petersburg, Russia four years ago. Join us as we stumble through the joys and perils of parenthood, while our son teaches us a few things along the road...


Nicky the Vampire

I guess with all the vampire craze these days, Nicky decided he didn't want to be left out.  Me, I'm more "Team Jacob"...goodness...have you seen the boy sans shirt?!  Anywho...I digress. 

So, I get to Nicky's school last night and I walk into his class and find him sitting at a table playing with some "friends".  The teacher (a sub, not one of his regular teachers) comes up to me and tells me that Nicky has been sinking his fangs into his friends (ok...she really just said he's been biting his friends, but it's more fun to say it my way).  This is the first we've heard of such a thing, so I said "Biting?!" (as if I didn't hear her correctly).  She nodded and said "Yes, yesterday he bit one friend on the arm, and today he bit another friend on the leg".  I then looked at Nicky and asked "Nicky, have you been biting your friends?".  At first he looked at me with an "uh oh...I'm busted" kind of look; then it changed to a smirk accompanied by a slight giggle.  I didn't know what to say - I just looked at him dumbfounded.  The teacher said "Oh yes, this is what he does when we tell him not to bite - he laughs at us."  She went on to tell me that he then receives a time-out and they talk to him about the behavior.  I told her we would talk to him about it, and apologized for his actions (not sure why I apologized...my chompers didn't meet with my friends' flesh, but I just felt that I should). 

When we got home I asked Nicky why he was biting his friends, and of course I got the "i don't know" response (seriously, did I really think he would give me an explanation?!).  I asked him who he bit on the arm and he told me "alexandra"; I asked him who he bit on the leg and he told me some name (a boy's) that I couldn't understand.  (he's an equal opportunity biter at least)  As if to say "i've already been punished for this, so can we move on and can i watch tv now?", he tells me "i sit in time out".  Ok...but...we're still gonna talk about this mister!  I asked him if his friends bite him (which I know they do, as he's come home with huge, red, mouth-shaped marks on his hand, arm, and forehead - interesting spot to gnaw on, but hey, I guess you just bite whatever you can get hold of).  He told me that yes, his friends do bite him.  I asked him if it hurts and does he like it when his friends bite him.  He told me that, yes, it hurts and no, he doesn't like it (well, I'm glad we cleared that part up - I was worried there for a minute!).  So I told him biting is not something you do to your friends and to please not do it anymore because it hurts and is not nice (yeah, so there!).  I tried to explain that when you're upset or frustrated with your friends you need to just use your words, or go tell a teacher (great, now I'm creating a tattle-tale...).  I may have then added, for good measure, "Santa doesn't bring presents to little boys that bite their friends" (Is that mean to tell him?  I don't know, but at that moment I felt it might give me some leverage).  I mean, what is it you say to stop a child from biting?

Well, my answer was in Parents Magazine - this month's issue had lots of advice on the subject - how'd they know?   Anyway, it basically said to do as I did (sans the Santa comment I would suspect) - don't make that big of a deal about it (I WAS rather calm while speaking to him...may have had something to do with the glass of wine I had with dinner), and to acknowledge that him being frustrated led him to bite.  Yay!  I did those things!  The question is, will I receive a report that Nicky's played another game of Twilight at school today?  I hope not...wouldn't that be somethin' if my words really sunk in?!  Sigh...I can dream, can't I?

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